i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
