sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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