the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
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I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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