It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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