T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
