I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
