I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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