If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize