My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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