the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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