Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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