it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
