I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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