Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Randomize
