I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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