Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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