I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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