Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
