did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
