As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs