I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
