Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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