Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
