her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
