why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
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it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
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College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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