I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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