THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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