When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
