I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
there is puke in my bra ... again
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