He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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