Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  You're so nebulous sometimes

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  (586): You're so nebulous sometimes http://tfl.nu/wa9d
  Replies (6) Good night (940) Bad night (487)
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  (805): View more from California

  You guys coming?

  (1-805): View more from California

  We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure

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  (805): You guys coming? (1-805): We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure http://tfl.nu/72j4
  Replies (4) Good night (1810) Bad night (419)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple

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  (919): dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple http://tfl.nu/sgcu
  Replies (61) Good night (1049) Bad night (6551)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it

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  (402): you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it http://tfl.nu/0kqo
  Replies (11) Good night (4065) Bad night (1572)
• Favorite

  (626): View more from California

  Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.

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  (626): Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her. http://tfl.nu/fyts
  Replies (7) Good night (4053) Bad night (1477)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.

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  (682): While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird. http://tfl.nu/l3im
  Replies (12) Good night (1030) Bad night (3974)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever

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  (305): The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever http://tfl.nu/qxjf
  Replies (17) Good night (4177) Bad night (1338)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch

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  (203): we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch http://tfl.nu/wvpl
  Replies (7) Good night (2381) Bad night (632)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.

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  (815): I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex. http://tfl.nu/6un6
  Replies (11) Good night (1538) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...

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  (970): Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out... http://tfl.nu/zr6z
  Replies (3) Good night (833) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.

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  (773): You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday. http://tfl.nu/8aa9
  Replies (4) Good night (1490) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.

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  (618): There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister. http://tfl.nu/tdo0
  Replies (7) Good night (1363) Bad night (623)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?

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  (515): When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education? http://tfl.nu/w56v
  Replies (2) Good night (822) Bad night (240)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....

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  (740): i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people.... http://tfl.nu/0ph5
  Replies (6) Good night (359) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.

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  (540): It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch. http://tfl.nu/7b1x
  Replies (2) Good night (274) Bad night (425)

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