I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
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