Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
