he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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