everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
