I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
