I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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