Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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