Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
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whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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