Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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