Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
