My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?