If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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