I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
