She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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