If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
