I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
