Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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