Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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