it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
