yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
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sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
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I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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